The Parenting Pod

Jordan has a girlfriend! Am I wierd to think he's too young? They see each other at school and talk on the phone. We haven't met her yet.

I don't think you're weird, but I do think 14 is a little young for a one-on-one relationship. A bunch of friends going out is one thing, but real dates? I think my kids will have to be a bit older...

My good friend's son must earn his Eagle Scout rank before he's allowed to date or drive.

I had a boyfriend when I was 14... but we didn't go on any real dates. There were group movie outings - where someone's mom had to drive - and a couple times we would hang out at my house or his.

I had a boyfriend at 14 also. We were inseparable! We did go on "dates" I suppose. But it was just his mom dropping us off at the movies and coming to pick us up later at the ice cream shop next door to the movies...pretty harmless. We hung out at his house a lot as well. And, of course with friends. It was all fairly innocent. But we dated until we were 17....and it didn't stay quite that innocent, so keep an eye out.

I taught 14yr olds prior to DD, and they were all dating. So, this is completely normal. For most, it was just hanging out together and pretty innocent. Though, some were way more serious than one should be at that age, so just be an involved parent.

It seems to be a common thing, but my kids are not allowed to date until they're at least 15. When my son was 12 or 13 he had a "girlfriend", because it was the thing to do and he felt like he had to fit in. But they did not "date", it was just known among their group of friends that they were a "couple". That was pretty much all there was to it. It didn't last long, thankfully. He didn't actually start dating until he was 15 or 16. I think a lot depends on what he means by "girlfriend". In my son's case (at that age) it really didn't mean much, so we were okay with it.

Payton has a boyfriend, and has "dated" for a while ( she's 13) but they don't actually go out outside of school time. They hang out at school, and text each other,but that's it so far. She hasn't even asked to go out anywhere with him. At this stage, I wouldn't allow her to go out with him alone anywhere, I've just started letting her go to the movies on her own with friends. Hanging out with groups I think is okay, as long as they are going out to do something...and not just hanging out at someone's house "watching movies" ( I remember all to well what that meant) A couple of girls in her youth group made a good point....why would I want to date before I can drive, who wants their parents coming along on their date? Important at this stage I think is keeping the lines of communication open...

We used to tease our daughters and tell them that when they started dating, their older brother would be their chaperone. No guy would dare try anything with him anywhere nearby! I think to them, that would be worse than having their parents come along!

Jordan no longer has the "girlfriend". They broke up on the last day of school because they would never see each other.
I told him to focus on school and football.